For those of you who don't have the privilege of meeting my mom, she is awesome. 100% amazing. She is supportive, loving, kind, and really funny. :) She saw this article in LDS Living and sent it to me. It was exactly what I needed to read. And I know that not a lot of people know what's going on - I'm actually on that list too - but this really helped me feel better. It's definitely helping with the whole patience thing, that's for sure.
http://ldsliving.com/story/64783-infertility-when-children-dont-come-easily
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Saturday, July 9, 2011
Sitting, waiting, wishing
It's interesting to see the trials of others. Sometimes a hardship for one person is actually the dream of another. Weird, right?
Life is interesting right now. We're in Houston, away from family and friends. Derrick is currently staffed on a project that takes him away from home Monday through Thursday. I just got a job and I work on Friday and Saturday, 2 of the 3 days that Derrick is here. Derrick is staffed in the management side of the project, exactly where he wants to be. I get to pay for my own car, something that is very important to me. I've met some really nice girls at my job. I don't know if I'm just being whiny and pessimistic - I really am trying to count my blessings - but the trials seem to be pulling a little bit stronger than usual. Maybe we've just had it really easy?
And that's not even the deepest of the woes. More than anything, ANYTHING, I want to have a baby. **READER BEWARE, THIS WILL GET GIRLY** I'd even settle for having my period on a somewhat regular basis just to know my body is working right! I'm thinking maybe that's one of the reasons I got the job that I did, interestingly enough. A co-worker told me about a doctor she's seeing about the same-ish type of problem, so I've been pointed in the right direction. Going to call my insurance on Monday and hopefully set an appointment sometime this week or next.
Mom tells me that people keep asking when we're going to start our family. As much as I love the people who are asking, I wonder if they would continue to ask if they knew how much I wanted to, how the ache gets bigger and bigger, to the point of tears.
But then there's the other side of it: we've only been trying since March, who am I to complain compared to all those girls out there who have been trying for years? In the middle, feeling stretched, just sitting, waiting, wishing for my miracle.
Life is interesting right now. We're in Houston, away from family and friends. Derrick is currently staffed on a project that takes him away from home Monday through Thursday. I just got a job and I work on Friday and Saturday, 2 of the 3 days that Derrick is here. Derrick is staffed in the management side of the project, exactly where he wants to be. I get to pay for my own car, something that is very important to me. I've met some really nice girls at my job. I don't know if I'm just being whiny and pessimistic - I really am trying to count my blessings - but the trials seem to be pulling a little bit stronger than usual. Maybe we've just had it really easy?
And that's not even the deepest of the woes. More than anything, ANYTHING, I want to have a baby. **READER BEWARE, THIS WILL GET GIRLY** I'd even settle for having my period on a somewhat regular basis just to know my body is working right! I'm thinking maybe that's one of the reasons I got the job that I did, interestingly enough. A co-worker told me about a doctor she's seeing about the same-ish type of problem, so I've been pointed in the right direction. Going to call my insurance on Monday and hopefully set an appointment sometime this week or next.
Mom tells me that people keep asking when we're going to start our family. As much as I love the people who are asking, I wonder if they would continue to ask if they knew how much I wanted to, how the ache gets bigger and bigger, to the point of tears.
But then there's the other side of it: we've only been trying since March, who am I to complain compared to all those girls out there who have been trying for years? In the middle, feeling stretched, just sitting, waiting, wishing for my miracle.
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